Untitled--18.

18.

I wanted to not talk about this, to avoid talking about this for now. But I will need to tell somebody eventually. You are leaving us. You were wife and mother, and that story is so important. I found out that you were second in three generations of single mothers, at least those who experienced a brief period of single motherhood. That needs to be spoken to somebody. You blamed yourself for your first marriage failing. That broke my heart to hear.

Now we try to go over the easy things. Your name. I am your granddaughter, this is your daughter. Your other daughter lives far away, in another country. You may not remember her at all sometimes. The veil gets thinner. You ask for your parents. You watch classic movies. I wonder how much of them you truly understand. Do you have your English at all still? I remember all the other relatives lost theirs before they went. With Gapa, speaking was too difficult at the end.

But it’s getting late, and I need to go soon. You need to go, too. I don’t know exactly what you comprehend anymore anyway. I’ll be back here again one day with someone else. I don’t want to think of who. I will know then, but I don’t need to know now. Your presence is a gift. Rest well.