Hurt Me Daddy, for I Have Blogged

I just had some realizations. No this is not me getting cocky or acting like I know everything. Just journaling some realizations. I'm also not reciting any of this in a judgy way. They're just observations. They also might be more specific to my city than to other cities. Or not. -Some people are actors who are good at acting like funny comedians onstage (A lot of people I watch at mics.) -Some people are funny people who are working on being good and consistently funny comedians, or are definitely good and consistently funny comedians. I can only hope some version of this is me, and I see a lot of people like this at mics and shows, too, and the people I respect and aspire to emulate in the comedy scene are like this. -Some people are comedians who are not funny/are depressing much of the time. If a person has reached feature or headliner status and is like this, it's likely that this is some kind of a persona that they determined worked for them at some point, but ...

Sometime between 2004 and Spring of 2006, I forcefully slammed a very large shoebox full of cassette tapes into the garbage can at my mother's house. You don't understand. Not just original cassette tapes. Mix tapes. During the peak hipster era of High Fidelity and Say Anything (much older, because yes we were already rehashing nostalgia), I committed a high crime against art and Xennial self-determination. I remember neither the context of the conflict, nor why I desired so strongly to sabotage myself. Was it later than then? Had I moved out again? Was it closer to 2008? I couldn't tell you. But I knew I was on one of my decluttering kicks. Inasmuch as I am messy and allow things to pile up (hopefully not to a hoarderly level) I have also gotten on occasionally forceful kicks of throwing my possessions away. Mostly because they reminded me of a part of myself that was over. Around this same time I think I dumped all the handwritten letters between me and beloved friends be...